BOY OH, BOILED? (Jin Mei Dumplings)

The sign reads “Dumplings” with a few Chinese characters above it. I wonder what this place sells. My guess would be steamed and fried dumplings. Turns out I’m only half right.

Dumplings, or more officially Jin Mei Dumplings is another cheap dumpling storefront in the heart of Chinatown. This one is a little off the beaten path on Henry Street, which is an area not many tourists wander into. When we entered around 3:00 on a Sunday afternoon, there was nobody inside. We were greeted apathetically and I placed the usual order – one order of fried dumplings and one order of boiled dumplings. Since we were hungry and it was cold out, I also chose to try the Pork Wonton Soup.

As usual, the fried dumplings were delivered right away on a paper plate (five for $1). The brown crust on the skin looked very dry and solid. These were definitely not made in the last few minutes (or even hours perhaps). The first bite confirmed what the visuals hinted at. It was as if I was chewing little pockets of cardboard. There wasn’t even any grease left on the dumplings to give it a kick of flavor. Just dry, chewy, burned dough.

Inside was not much better. The pork and scallions were killed – no crunch, no juice, no flavor. I had to douse these suckers with lots of soy vinegar. The sauce looked watered down and resembled complimentary tea much more than it did dumpling sauce. Needless to say it didn’t help much.

So I didn’t finish these and sipped on the mediocre wonton soup (which was flavored with tiny dried crustaceans that resembled insects) while waiting for the boiled dumplings to arrive. I waited. And waited. And waited. Finally I got up to inquire what was taking them so long. I understand that boiled dumplings are usually made to order and can take close to 10 minutes, but I had discarded the half eaten fried versions at least 20 minutes ago.

Turns out the woman had no idea what I was talking about. I’m positive I ordered them, since I tend to do it by rote at this point. So, fine. It was a miscommunication – that happens at foreign food shops, so I ordered them again. She looked lost and told me they didn’t have them. She attempted to give me some steamed pork buns, but that wasn’t what I wanted. I checked the menu again and sure enough it read: “Chives and Pork Steamed Dumpling.” Sure the grammar may not have been correct, but they listed them there. When I pointed this out, she said they weren’t doing them today. Huh? No steamed dumplings at a dumpling shop? My guess is she was feeling lazy and would only serve the dumplings that were already pre-cooked. I asked if they were going to serve them tomorrow and she said, “Maybe.” So I left with a bad taste and a bad taste in my mouth.

Fast forward to a few days later when I was once again on the hunt for dumplings in Chinatown. I figured I’d stop back in and see if the steamed dumplings were now available. It was a little more crowded, but I ordered them from the same lady. And I was very confused by what I received. They looked exactly the same as the fried dumplings. They had that awful brown char on the outside, but this time they looked to be greasy. I surrendered the dollar and decided to give them a try.

The idea of steaming then frying the dumplings (which must have been the case here) seems to make sense – to soften them up and then seal in the moisture with that crispy outer char – but something went terribly wrong. These were not crispy, not tender, and not tasty. They had more grease than the fried versions did the other day and I discovered it was rather pointless for me to return.

Things are all wrong here. The sign reads Dumplings outside and yet they don’t always offer all the dumplings they advertise inside. And when they do, it’s not at all like the versions other authentic Chinese storefronts serve. Maybe they should take a clue from another cheap dumpling spot in the neighborhood, Fried Dumpling and re-name themselves “Fried Dumpling… and Sometimes Steamed Dumplings”.

Does Jin Mei Dumplings have the best dumplings in NY? Far from it. They get a 4 out of 10 because while their fried dumplings have a crunch on the outside, that’s about it. As for the steamed dumplings, don’t even ask.